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Competition
Thom Yorke's Pants!

It's Official!  And You Can Win(net) Them!
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A Truly Amazing Package!

Your favourite indie schmindie webzine has truly excelled itself this week with its special offer - one that is quite literally pants!  We have in our possession a pair of Thom Yorke’s trolleys!  Thanks to a particularly light fingered member of staff at the Clean Getaway laundromat in Oxford we have obtained a pair of Y-fronts previously owned by the sleepy eyed angst rocker.   Imagine yourself wearing these scuddies!  Can there be a hetro female on this planet who wouldn’t literally fancy the pants off you?!!!  


They’ll be foaming at the front bottom when they see you in these red hot spudsacks!  So what do you need to do to win these highly prized ass-sets?  Well, it’s as easy as fur pie.  Just write a 10,000 word piece on “I should have these scaggy baggies because…” and send to hummingjockeys@soundsxp.com.  The best will claim the prize and no doubt be beating off the totty with a poopoo stick for months to come.

Warning: Pants may contain nuts.

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 Apology:   Due to an unfortunate mishap the David Gray nodding dogs offered in last fortnight’s issue have been identified as being radioactive.  The novelty toys, specially imported from a place called Chernobyl, somewhere east of the Isle of Dogs, have now been impounded by the authorities.   A spokesman for HM Customs said “I can’t believe how stupid these soundpk people have been.  Not only was their product highly dangerous but they had been smuggled into the country in the belly of a white rhino.  We may not have noticed if the beast’s beard hadn’t slipped after its twenty seventh complimentary vodka on the plane.  That and all the charging up and down butting people obviously”.  Police are currently frantically trying to trace the only person known to have purchased one of these items in an advance order; a Mrs Ethel Nugent of Woolwich.   A police spokesman said “It’ll be easy, we’ll wait till darkness falls.  She’ll be lighting up half of South East London by then”.  If you want to know what you could have bought click here.

 Links to some other overpriced rubbish you may have missed (if you
had something better to do with your time and money):