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SoundsXP Message Boards - Indie, Indiepop, Nu-Folk and Alt-Country Forums • View topic - Joke

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 Post subject: Joke
PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 2:15 pm 
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Vimto supping slipper merchant

Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2003 6:52 pm
Posts: 3
A bloke walks into a lift and stands next to a very pretty woman.

He asks, "Excuse me, can I smell your fanny?"
"No!" she replies, "Don't be disgusting."
"Oh well," the man shrugs his shoulders, "It must be your feet then."


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 5:24 pm 
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Chutney ferret with lazy eye
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Joined: Wed Jun 08, 2005 8:41 pm
Posts: 1653
Location: Coventry
Here's one for anybody who knows anything about poker:

An Iowa farmer wakes up one morning and hears a voice in his head saying "quit your job, sell your house, take all your money and go to Las Vegas."

He ignores the voice, but it keeps on at him, always saying the same thing: "quit your job, sell your house, take all your money and go to Las Vegas."

The voice gets more and more insistent, and after a couple of weeks, just to get some peace, the farmer gives in. He quits his job, sells his house, takes all his money and goes to Las Vegas.

As soon as he lands at the airport the voice says "Go to Binion's Horseshoe". So the farmer takes a cab to Binions.

As soon as he gets there, the voice says, "enter the World Series of Poker". So the farmer stumps up $10,000 and enters the WSOP main event.

He sits down, and, first hand, he's dealt the ace of spades and the ace of clubs.

The voice says "go all in."

The farmer pushes his whole $10,000 into the middle. Two other players call.

The flop comes nine, ten, jack, all hearts.

The voice says: "fuck".


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 Post subject: Re: Joke
PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 9:53 pm 
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Cocker's trouser zip fiddler
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Joined: Fri Jul 23, 2004 1:02 am
Posts: 3816
Location: In lust. In trouble.

_________________
Jarvis Cocker or David Bowie or AVB or Johnny Borrell, she isn't picky

Cavey Cocker, Cup Cake Queen, Saint Thomas.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 10:29 pm 
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cRaZy cat with the bongos
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Joined: Tue Jun 15, 2004 2:07 am
Posts: 742
Location: Otranto, Comune di Roccia Nera

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Life's But A Walking Shadow


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Apr 28, 2006 2:33 pm 
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Cocker's trouser zip fiddler
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jul 23, 2004 1:02 am
Posts: 3816
Location: In lust. In trouble.

_________________
Jarvis Cocker or David Bowie or AVB or Johnny Borrell, she isn't picky

Cavey Cocker, Cup Cake Queen, Saint Thomas.


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 Profile  
 
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